Weekends are work!!

Ok, this may not make much sense but once again my blog .. my rules.. so its ok, right? When the kids are home they resemble this guy:
They come in from school on Friday, they attach the feed bag and they do not remove it until bed time on Sunday night. It used to be almost a goal of mine to keep up with them, think I am kidding go ahead. (So not) It usually goes something simliar to this:

1:45 PM first kid comes in heads immediately to the fridge looks for something to eat, find it eats.

2:20 PM Kids two three and four (four is the 16 year olds girlfriend) walk in they grab something to eat by 2:30 PM We are in the throws of household calastenics (AKA Chore BINGO)

3:30 PM Mary and David come in. David immediately scales the counters (think Spiderman) to get down an Oreo Cakester (although we have changed these to the 100 calorie pack. 2 points!! and um HELLO Oreos!! WOOOHOOO!

5:00 PM as Chuck and I are about to begin our walk the "When's dinner I am STARVING" conversations start. Yes, Starving poor you. whats it been almost 20 minutes since you ate? Oh God where is the HUMANITY?!?!?! Quick someone call Feed the children they are wilting away to nothing.. (Sarcasm...just another service we offer)

WE get back from our walk feed them, they proceed to eat like the above seen guy til their bed time some of them WAY after Midnight.. yep, my kids are pigs. Than the following morning it starts all over with the exception of the fact that it goes on from the time they roll out of the piggy trough until they finally go to bed Sunday night.

Now, when a person is dieting this is stressful!!! Now, the thing about it is, I have learned to get around that. I munch on healthy snacks, I still workout every day (may I point out that I have not skipped ONE day in the past 3 weeks?!!? impressed? I am!) I used to be the person who would beg for the Weekends, now I beg for Monday...so they can get out of the house and let me diet in peace! :o)

Sighs.. must be nice to be young and only worry about what you will eat next huh? yep, I think so too

Walking and cadences....

You have I am sure at one point or another heard a cadence when Military people are exercising a typical one goes like this (no offense to other branches, I am a Army brat a Navy wife and equally love our military!!):

Well I Don't Know...Well, I don't know

but I've been told

Those Navy wings are made of gold.

I don't know but it's been said

That Air Force wings are made of lead!

So, on Run/Walk days I have started to come up with one in my head, even though I have an Ipod touch that is fabulous you can't help but think of stuff to say:

Walking, running take your turn

Go ahead and feel the burn

If you keep going around the bin

Your butt will shrink

and you'll get thin!!

Yea, not exactly poetic but hey it works right? than for the Wii Active I have one, now this one.. well its unique but it works:

Wii Active makes you sweat

Wii Active makes you fit!

But sometimes that trainer

Man.. what a beotch! :o)~

(yea I know proper spelling works better but hey I am trying to behave)

I know I am not exactly poetic, but sometimes you need something to keep your feet going so there you have it.. anyone know any other cadences? Real or made up? :o)~ Share em!

Destination: Success

In December when I secretly started to plan this diet plan out, I told myself "just breathe and stick it out as long as you can" That was early December before I put my toes on the scale. While out shopping for bad for me food for New Years Eve.. er um I mean for appetizers for New Years Eve I stepped on a scale, I am not sure why the thing did not start sending off alarms through the store or mutter "GET OFF ME!" but at that moment something inside of me clicked. I was killing myself. I was going to die if I did not stop. I had headaches that 5 Advil (at once.. yes I know its only supposed to be two. .my logic was Ibuprofen 800+ was what I wanted.. it stinks I know!) would not even dull... I had such pain in my head from my high blood pressure most nights I could not sleep more than a few hours and that was only if I took something to knock myself out.

I started to really look at Weight Watchers, I did it while nobody was paying attention and I swore this time would be different. I swore this time I was going to change my life, not because anyone made me but because my life depended on it. I have changed, and sometimes I think "Okay, but that person is still tucked inside, and what do I do if she sneaks out?" I don't want to find out. I honestly don't. I have worked so hard to lose this weight and for the first time I have seen an old friend that was dormant for so long someone had to tell me who it was: Self-esteem.

I have always been the happy go lucky person, I made jokes to get through the day because hey if you can't laugh with the fat chick who can you laugh with? Then without warning, I realized it wasn't that this was so hard to do, it was that I was too pigheaded to do it. Now, I wake up and I drink a cup of coffee, eat a yogurt or a bagel with apple butter (35 calories a serving!! how kick ass is that?!?!) I drink at LEAST 16 ounces of water and I clean up the house. (Oh man for awhile I would just wait for the kids to get home and Emily and I would take a nap... as I type this.. Emily is napping.. alone! I have not napped with her in almost two months! on Wii Active days when she naps I Wii Active but today is Cool Runnings and I am waiting for my buddy to get home.

I have the most amazing support system (a good bit of them are people reading this right now and I can not thank you enough or give you enough shout outs!), I have went from a 30/32 to a 22/24 (and I can see a 18/20 in my sights.. its not that close yet but dang it I am gonna get there!!) I am so excited about this, I am so excited that I am no longer afraid to move! I am no longer afraid of exercise or eating right. I am not at my goal and won't be for some time but right now at least I feel I can set my destination of success in my sights, and it feels like winning a Gold Medal in the Olympics, scoring a perfect 10 with the Russian judge and making all those people who doubted me think twice!

Yep, feels pretty damn good

The Calculator of Death.

What on earth is she talking about? What is the calculator of death. Well it is that thing that is in the bathroom, you know it. If you are female you have avoided it, and every 28 days you hiss at it. Ok maybe hiss is the wrong word for it, you cuss it out- you spit it out-and wish that 1000 Monkeys have its way with it. Yes, I am talking about the scale.

Than the other day I realized, its not the scale we hate. Nope, instead it is the math problem we have to do to step on the damn thing.

Big Butt stepping on small white object (the trajectory of the whole thing is flawed!)

+

Clothes--no wait--minus clothes because who wants to get weighed in clothes... ok so we have

Big Butt stepping on small white object -clothes

ok that's better...

-

Two pounds for the stress that the kids have put you under this week (no kids name something or someone its ok)

=

Your weight.

Yep, its a math problem.. now things that will effect your weight on this scale, some positive some not so positive:

a) your balance is off today take 1 pound off

b) You have had a rough morning/afternoon or evening take 1 pound off

c) You fit in the skinny jeans gain a pound for being a bitchy and owning skinny jeans

d) You sang in the shower which is exercising take off 1 pound

and

e) You gave it up when you were crawling into bed exhausted but dammit its a wifely duty

minus 3 pounds for a good deed.

That's it I am now shaped more like this in my mind.. go me:

weekly Wonders

What is Weekly wonders? well,as of right now it is my theme for Wednesday. Once week I will post the things I have wondered on this path. Are you ready? Lets do this:

1) Weekly Wonder 1: Who came up with the idea to make the Wii Active Trainers so annoying? Its not personal, I know this. I really do. but.. this chick is telling me to hit the "show me how the button" because I am not low enough. Ok..see but the problem is my little avatar and the trainer avatar are doing the SAME thing. grr.. someday I am gonna make a user friendly Wii Active Trainer who will just say "girl is that sweat? Get a glass of water you earned it!!"

2) Weekly Wonder 2: Can anyone notice I am losing weight or do I have really supportive friends and family? I know pictures will help but see.. I don't do pictures..not in years. I am chicken.. its ok say it with me bok bok bok. I know I know. I am working on it. This whole picture thing is well its a step at a time ok?

3) Weekly Wonder 3: Did you ever notice as you lose weight you start to think of other improvements you want to make? I plan on cutting my hair soon, and donating it to Locks of Love. My hair is crazy long but can I part with 12 inches? Sighs. I think I can.

4) Weekly Wonder 4: Why are my kids waiting for me to crack? Do you know what I mean? David comes to my water bottle every day and looks at me and says "no soda Mom?" To which I reply "No, David I don't drink Soda anymore" I then get deer in the headlights look. The teenagers are worse.. "you are working out again?? didnt you do that yesterday??" Yes and I am going to do it again tomorrow..eventually maybe they will all get it.. please?

5) Weekly wonder 5: Does my butt look big in these jeans.. wait don't answer that. .give me two more months ok??

6) Weekly wonder 6: How exactly did the Hungry girl come up with so many great recipes? Does she know that she is the queen to many a dieter? If not, someone needs to tell her. Dear Hungry Girl.. you rock.. xoxox--Tricia

7) Weekly wonder 7: My biggest.. how do you pick a 5k? Does anyone know? does it matter which one or just pick one? I have decided I am gonna do it. I am gonna do one in the fall. Whats crazy is I think I would be ready to walk one in the spring, but should I?

See!! Lots on my mind!! Any wonders you guys have? Any you wanna share? Let me know!!

Exercise and Winnie the Pooh

Now most people when they look for a quote from someone brilliant to get them motivated, for me I look no further than my entertainment center. What an odd statement huh? Well let me 'splain Lucy! My entertainment cabinet is covered with my obsession. Winnie the Pooh.

Winnie the Pooh does what he refers to his stoutness exercises:

From: Winnie The Pooh and the Honey TreeWritten by: Richard M. Sherman and Robert B. ShermanPerformed by: Sterling Holloway [Pooh]

[Pooh:]Up - Down - UpWhen I up, down, touch the ground it puts me in the moodUp, down, touch the ground in the mood {smacks lips} for food

I am stout, round and I have found speaking poundage-wise

I improve my appetite when I exercise

*ripping sound*
Oh stuff and fluff
*ties his back together again*
That's better.

*reflection in the mirror talks back*
Thank youNow, where was I?

*grumbling sound from stomach*

Oh, yes, I'm rumbly in my tumbly. Time for something sweet
I am short, fat, and proud of that and so with all my might

I up, down, up-down to my appetite's delight

While I up, down, touch the ground

I think of things to chew

Mmm, like honey, milk, and chocolate

With a hefty-happy appetite I'm a hefty-happy Pooh.
[Chorus]With a hefty-happy appetite he's a hefty-happy Pooh.

See, this was me. .anything that was physical activity deserved a reward at the end...before it was food or something sugary drinkwise. Now, my reward is a hot shower and putting on pants that have not fit me in so long I have to take off my shoes and socks to count how many months (cough.. ok in some cases years) its been since I last wore that size.

Today is my rest day from the Wii Active, and that makes it day 3 of week 1 of Cool Runnings, ah but the damn rain in the sky.. grrr So what do I do?

When the older kids get home I go out and I walk my 1.5 miles (or more! Saturday it was 1.8!! be impressed I am!!) why? because I won't melt! This is important to me, to keep on this regime. I feel better than I have in years! I used to have crippling high blood pressure head aches and I used to get stress related hives. Neither of these have come to visit since the end of December!

So while Pooh (and I love him) thinks of food, I will think of getting out of the 20's and back into the teens in clothes.

:o)~ I think I like that trade off. ;o)~

Maybe I will have to take this guys title from my hubby since it appears I am getting rather bouncy:

Emotional eating and the conspiracy theory.

Since I was probably five or six, I have been an emotional eater. Think about it, in a way we are guilty of it, and realistically it starts with our parents.

Fall down outside= "Here's a cookie it will make you feel better" As the tears fall, more cookies are handed to you until in the very end all you have left is crumbs and very few tears. All better.

Broken heart= "Hagan Dasz would never hurt me... White Russian .. one spoon." he loves me (bite), he loves me not (bite), he loves me (bite), he loves me not (bite) all the way to the bottom of the container. sighs..

Bad day= "What do you want for dinner? Your choice" Really do you pick the good one? Nope.. you go for the one with the cheesecake, why? because Cheesecake makes you feel better"

Celebrations= "you did it! have a piece of cake!" WOOOHOO I sure did! I deserve TWO!

Birthdays= "you are a year older! YAY You!!" I am almost 40, just hand me the damn cake and get the out of my face. Ok I am not that bad but it sure does feel like that.

Logically you know that eating like this is not good for you, and you have even said it "I don't need it, I shouldn't be doing this" but coulda shoulda woulda emotionally Your gonna. Sighs.

So now how does one diet with emotional eating? This is probably my biggest speed bump, I get upset I head to the cabinets. Only I found recently that if I get upset walking it off or blogging or a ton of other things makes me feel just as good as eating.

Emotional eating be damned! I am gonna beat ya! Now don't get me wrong I still crave stuff boy do I! And last night Chuck and I had a four point cobbler that was divine but it also took care of my emotional need for something last night. It may sound silly but you can still emotionally eat you just have to do it right.

I am not sure why this time the diet is different, I can't explain it. I just know that at this point something had to change, something had to give and in the end its working. At the end of the day I go to sleep and feel good about myself and that tops a container of Hagan Dasz any day in my book

I would like to thank The Academy

Ok ok probably not the Academy, but I would like to thank Rebecca over at Letters from Crazyville (a mom on the edge) who gave me an award the other day on her Blog. I am so completely shocked, and thank you sincerely for the Sunshine Award. Since this blog is rather new, I only have a whopping 5 followers (but I love you all I swear!!) I do believe in pay it forward though and would like to give this award to a few blogs that I read, some who I follow on my other blog:

Maria- Over at The ballad of Big Nothing, she is talented, she is brilliant and she makes me smile! Maria is Chuck's sister in law (ok supposed to be former but he still loves her and so do I!!) She is Icelandic and writes this entire blog in English. She is adorable <3>,


Nikia-- Over at Life's fires what can I say? Nikia is someone I know that will always tell it like it is no matter how mad people get. She in turn is one of my closest friends and I personally think she is the greatest! (plus she does lots of great giveaways (add her!!.. NOW!)

Lisa--Over at Oh Boy, Oh Boy, Oh Boy...Life as a working mom with three boys! She is also a wickedly talented photographer (like Maria!!) and she is a Mom of three little boys (The youngest one is gonna marry Emily some day, I have decided.. they would make really cute grandbabies for us!)

and Returning the favor back to Rebecca--Over at Letters from Crazyville (a mom on the edge) I can be having the worst day and I read her blog (even old ones) and giggle. I also am thankful for her because she is so helping me on this Weight loss Journey. Rebecca Rocks!

So there you have it, my awards are given. Pay it forward Ladies! Have a fantastic day!!

These are a few of my favorite things...

ok if the song is stuck in your head now, please accept my most humble of humble apologies. Ok? I didn't do it on purpose.. I swear.. but it works ok?

In the past few weeks as I have changed my life style, I have a list of what are now my favorite things. So now its time to share some, so without further adieu:

Blue Diamond Almond milk-- Less calories than regular milk but flat out 1 word: Yum! I use it in smoothies, I drink it as is, I have even put it in cereal. It tastes good gives me the vitamins I need and I really enjoy it!! :o)~

The Hungry Girl--Where do I start? Every thing I have tried from her is pure gold. The only one I am not ready to do yet is the tofu noodles. I just can't. I will be flexible and move on to wheat pasta I just can't do tofu.. especially when everything I read says it is fishy.. um blech! My favorites: The Turkey Reuben, the Marshmallow cupcakes, her version of a frappucino, the Eggs bene-chic, and the southwest egg rolls. If you have not tried anything from her.. whatcha waiting for? Good food that is good for you? talk about your win win!!

Smart Water-- I know water is just water but for some reason I love smart Water. I also love the shape of their bottles (they fit beautifully in my cup holder). Smart water is good and tastes good!! Rock on!!!

Wii Active and Wii Active More Workouts--Wii Active More Workouts is what I started with first, it gives you a good intense "Why are you killing me" workout. Than I got Wii Active and discovered that they have sports activities, I am playing baseball and tennis and volleyball and basketball as well as cardio and lunges, and dancing. I can not say more about this program but if you get it buy a new set or resistance bands from Gamestop 9.99 they are soo much better than the ones that come with the game!

Cool Runnings: Couch potato to a 5K-- Great way to get your body moving and get ready to really work it!! My husband tried it today and even he admits it is a work out and a helluva one at that! you really move!! And you feel it! Finally a program I can follow.

WW Ipod App and the Jogging App- I use both to keep me focused and on track, they are invaluable to someone trying to lose weight.

100 Calorie snacks from Nabisco--They are wonderful when you need something sweet but don't want to kill your alloted points for the day. I would be so lost without these. I love that they come in small packages but you get so much. .I swear the bags are never ending!! yum!!

Bolthouse juices--8 ounces.. 1 point and yummy.. enough said.

laaloosh.com--This lady is a genuis, she posts so many great ideas and her blog is full of info that is perfect for someone trying to just lose some weight and not kill themselves.

Chobani Yogurt--I have discovered that Chobani is wonderful. you get a big cup and it just tastes so yummy!! I can eat one and be satisfied until lunch time. <3>

Arnolds Sandwich thins--The worst part of dieting for me is having to give up bread. As crazy as this sounds, I am a bread fanatic. So these little thins are the perfect answer for me. One set makes a great hamburger roll or sandich roll. I am impressed

Mushrooms, Onions, peppers and assorted other veggies--I used to swear off mushrooms I refered to them as fungus. Now I love them. I eat them at most meals, and love the flavor. Onions and peppers and other veggies and I are also now friends its like one big ole pot of Kumbaya!

Friends and family--Ahh see you knew I had to get sappy, my friends and family are my lifeline. they listen to me, give me praises and really keep me grounded. I get told I can do it, and I am starting to think i can!!

So there you have it. .my favorite things. Did I miss anything or did I cover it all?

This is not for the weak of heart.

I have learned as I have told various friends that I am dieting that "oh I can't do it" or "Oh its just too hard" or (my personal favorite) "I am not as strong as you" Ok. .let's talk shall we? Woman to er um reader? If I can do this... anyone can. If I can stop eating the way I was.. ANYONE can. think I am kidding? Let me tell you something, on an average day I used to eat almost 5000 calories I added it up. I am not sure how I did not have a heart attack. I am being seirous. In the past 7 weeks, I have completely retaught myself how to eat. For breakfast I eat a yogurt and a cup of coffee. Lunch varies today it was a bowl of grapes (1 point) and 2 string cheese (2 points). Tonights dinner is steake and chicken fajitas with a 1 point Mexican creamy dip that we will use on top. :o)~ See? Easy peasy!!!

I think people need to realize that the hardest part of dieting is making the decision that you can do it. Its ok to spend an extra 5 minutes in the grocery store to read ingredients and calories. Its ok to put the soda down!! If you have to have it, diet soda or some of the zero ones are awesome. ( I recently discovered I like sprite zero and will drink one once a week (its my treat)) other than that I drink almond milk, water, and coffee.. thats it)

So here's my offer... if you feel like you can't do it talk to me. I will help you in every way possible. I promise! I will help you. I know it sounds hard but really it can be done. :o)~

Week 1 of the 30 day challenge.

I have discovered on this journey, that I have friends that are just so amazing. When I mentioned I got Wii Active about a month ago, a friend (who I reconnected with thanks to Facebook... have I mentioned how I LOVE Facebook??) said when I was ready she would do a 30 day challenge with me. (Rebecca-I adore you in ways you will NEVER know!!) Today I completed Day 4, Weds was a rest day. And I have to say after a week I was expecting pain and wishing and praying for death. But instead I find myself looking forward to week 2.

Imagine this, when I started this walking up steps of any kind (be it 2 or 20)I would lose my breath. I could not make it without hurting physically. I could not chase my kids, I could not do anything essentially. If it was physical activity, I avoided it. Now, I love it. I love working out and making sure I make the time for it is such a piece of cake. My old excuse was "who has time? I am a mother of six" but ya know if I am not sitting on my well arse.. I can do it ;o)~

I look at it this way, every week I work out I am giving my kids a chance at having me a bit longer. Think about it, when this journey started I was at my highest weight ever... EVER....and after 1 month, I am almost smaller than I was in the past 5 years! I know I sound like I am tooting my own horn and um beep beep. :o)~

Until next time. .off to make WW crabcakes for dinner. YUM!!

Inspiring to Inspire

I have never found myself to be someone that felt like I was the inspiring type. Yes, I am an overly happy person who sometimes makes people think that I am on something (just life baby.. just life) But recently I post my Facebook statuses and people come back and post replies wishing me well "Good luck I know you can do it!" I have had people tell me "I am inspiring them to make changes" Me? Little (ok not so little but we are working on it.. don't judge!) ole me? why? What have I done differently than every other person who has put out there that they are taking this journey..

And than it dawned on me.. that is it.

I am putting it out there. I have had seven babies over the past 20 years (20 this Sunday for my Matthew who is in Heaven <3 as a matter of fact). I have never been a toothpick, I have never even been a medium sized fire place log. Nope, I was always the bigger girl but it was never something that I let define me. It was part of my life for sure, I had made countless bad decisions and those decisions were effecting me in every single move I made. Now, I am making the right decisions, and THEY are defining me in every single move I make. Breakfast used to be whatever I grabbed and usually a good bit of it. Now I eat a yogurt and either a cup of coffee or tea. At lunchtime I was not against Emily and I eating a bowl of french fries smothered in bad stuff. Now I eat a sandwich on a sandwich thin, chips that are baked or low fat, some fruit or even a 100 calorie dessert. And I am just as full but not as sick as I was from the bad stuff. Dinners are now thought out and not thrown together on the fly. I cook, I bake, I eat! I am not suffering I LOVE it! I love that I exercise, I love that I can lunge! that I can do curl ups! (two months ago I didnt know what a curl up was!!

So, if I am inspiring you, I thank you for saying so.. but really I think I am inspiring me too . I love the numbers on the scale going down, but right now more than that I love that I am taking back my life and feeling like I made the winning homerun in Game 7 of the World Series.

Determination and the Plus side of life

Last night, I lamented to my husband that I needed nice pants to wear to church. I had a pair of khaki pants on my pants shelf that I had tried on in December that had the "no chance in Hell are you putting me on" Attitude problem. (Think teenager with a head twitch). So I explain that I can't try them on because well, I didnt have the proper underwear on (ya know the ones that pull you in and make breathing a mystery) And he says "Just try" So I slide them over my legs (uh oh no resistance).. up over my fanny (and thats a lot of fanny btw).. I button BOTH buttons and voila. They fit. SHUT UP! It was like Christmas and my birthday all in one. It was so fricking robo hot it made my day. These little milestones are like big boulder stones to me. When I try something on and it fits its like a silent WOOHOOO erupts out of me. I can't help it.

So today I start Cool Runnings: Cool Running :: The Couch-to-5K Running Plan Nikia (my lone follower so far) put this on her FB and I started to think about it.. ALOT. Today is my rest day from Wii Active and today is the day I start Cool Runnings. I am looking forward to it but I am nervous. What if someone out there sees me walking/running and laughs hysterically. I would die. But than I realize who cares? Its not their life! Its mine. And 2010 is the year I get my life back right? So here I go, wish me luck!

So my support system through this has been amazing. My husband Chucky has been with me step by step, never making me think I could not do this, instead he has been cheerleading me on. And I am grateful. My friends (Nikia, Mel (who offered to sell the GS cookies I bought to avoid temptation, I am really not worried about it.. 4 thin mints is 4 points I can eat just 4 I have willpower!), Desere, my cousin and good friend Ellen, The ladies of 2010 Weight loss on FB, my HS friends (Rebecca, Stephanie, and so many more), My Iceland friends, numerous other friends, and my family (most of them) I am grateful for the support, I am grateful for the love and help. Thank you all so much!!

Inspiration comes in weird shapes and sizes, and however it comes however you get the support system it is a blessing beyond belief!

Battling the Bulge,

So, here I am. Posting on a new forum about an old topic. Its not that I don't love my blogger blog, I do. With all my heart. I just feel this topic is best left somewhere else. So here I am. A little background about myself, I am a woman who in 2010 decided this was the year I gain control of myself.

Why? because when you go somewhere and your 5 year old son says to anyone around and you hear it "My mom has a big belly" it starts to hit home. When you have four steps to walk into your house and discover by the third you are out of breath, it hits home. When you realize that Dr Pepper is more important than most other things in your life, that it is a crutch its time to do something. I knew exactly what I had to do but I did not know how to do it? I got on a scale and saw a number that alarmed me, and broke my heart. I found myself becoming more and more angry, fighting with the entire world. Hating myself in ways that nobody should hate themself.

So on January 4th, with my humor intact, I approached Weight Watchers head on. Since that fateful day on December 30, 2009 I have dropped 37 lbs. SHUT UP! No really I have. I can feel a difference, I can feel a new spring in my step. Friends are noticing. ITs lovely. But is it enough? Nope I want more. This blog? Well what is it for you ask? This is for me to get it out there. To post about how I feel and what I need most, support. I work out daily on the Wii Active (man whoever thought that up is a genuis, but there are days I really wanna kill them), I adore the Hungry girl, and I am a huge fan of Weight watchers.

Yep, this is my life. And now you are part of it. How you ask? Well you are reading this, if your interest is peaked let's do it together. If you need some support, email me. Lean on me. I am here. I am ready to fight this battle, and trust and believe I plan to win.