Rationalizig the irrational.

I can admit (finally) that I am overweight because of years of body abuse. There truly is no other way to say it. Nobody forced me to eat the junk food, I did it because well quite honestly it tasted good and I liked it. The fact is, given the choice, most people will reach for the cupcake as opposed to reaching out for the granola. The fact is, we are what we eat and for a long time I was sugar and crap. (maybe thats what made me so sweet).

I used to wake up and start eating, my choices were never healthy. I was a junkfood and soda aholic, in the worst sense of the word. I used to drink 90+ ounces of Dr Pepper a day, I never drank water except when I had to. Now, I have not had a Dr Pepper since January 3rd, not even a sip! Ok that is a lie. I have had Diet Dr Pepper, because well its 0 calories and I can. But otherwise I drink water and iced tea (No not omg sweet tea.. iced tea)

I think of every meal item, every menu and every thing that will go in or near my mouth each day. Why? because if I don't I will eat everything. Today for instance breakfast consisted of frosted mini wheats, 1/2 cup of 2% milk. Lunch was Potatoes (leftover from dinner last night... baked 1 cup), with 1 TBSP of hummus mixed in (5 points). I will be eating a cup of grapefruit (2 pts) in a few minutes but as of right now I am good. I am not starving... I am not wishing for more food. I am content. Previously, this would not have happened. Previously, I would have been convinced I was starving and eat more. Not necessarily out of hunger but out of boredom. I eat when I am bored, if I keep busy.. I don't eat. Emily and I went outside a bit ago and walked around the block, not a long walk but it is 75 degrees and gorgeous, she sat and I pushed my little diva (complete with Shades).

These changes have saved my life, I my live to see my grandchildren. In January, that was severely something I questioned. I have lost 81 lbs, and while I still have at LEAST another 80 to go, I believe I can do it . I no longer rationalize that food is my friend, I know we can be friends we just have to do it on my terms.